"Why"

As the last blog of the semester I thought it would be best to reflect on a day I went to St. Katherine’s elementary school to spend time with the children there. It was by far the deepest into Baltimore I have ever been, and one of the most revealing experiences I’ve had at Loyola.

Driving down North Charles Street into the city, a path familiar to me as it was the road usually taken into the harbor and fells point, our car suddenly turned left into territory I had never entered. As the houses got smaller and smaller, closer and closer together, I noticed the demographics of the area changing. Little by little there were more broken windows, more holes in the roofs. We were truly in Baltimore now. After almost being hit by cars oblivious to their surroundings, we arrived at St. Katherine’s. Everyone in the car seemed to hesitate before getting up. We were in a neighborhood very different than Loyola College. Every person that walked by was a potential threat. I was appalled by my own nervousness. Who was I to judge people based merely on where they lived. Walking into the school we were brought into a classroom where the after school activities were taking place.

As we were introduced to the children we split up, some of us to play board games, other sports, and others arts and crafts. I went into the arts and crafts room and met Katie, a first grader at the school. “Why are you all white?” was the very first thing she said to me. How does one respond to such a question? I was completely speechless and all I could do was smile and say “I really don’t know.” She shrugged her shoulders and continued to draw. As we continued to talk she told me of how she loved Jesus. He was her best friend, she told me, and with him she could do anything. As we sat drawing cats, rainbows, dogs, and flowers she continued to chat away about her family. Her mother had recently had a baby girl, and Katie was very proud to be a new big sister. Up until the end of our time at St. Katherine’s I had a sweet experience with a little girl, but then just before we were leaving she turned to me and said, “You should pray for poor people. You really should.” And nodded her head to confirm her statement. I looked at her in awe and said that I would. Upon getting up to leave she begged me to stay, asking if I was coming back the next day.

This experience reminded me of a photography exhibit I visited earlier in the year depicting Baltimore. I remember seeing pictures of small children in the streets. Innocent school girls dancing around a lamppost, 12 year old boys holding guns. Children have been marked by the problems in Baltimore and as students at Loyola, and as members of the Jesuit community, we need to help those who are less fortunate than us, and try to better understand how the gaps have been formed. We have to realize that it is not just the Inner Harbor and Fells Point that make Baltimore Baltimore. It is St. Katherine’s Elementary School, it is York Road, it’s Katie, a little girl who dares to ask questions about our society.

Meeting Katie truly changed my perspective of Baltimore. Here was a little girl who saw in black and white, poor and rich. She had God in her heart and had questions that I had never asked myself at age 19. Why were we all white? Why are there people who are rich and people who are poor? In order to truly be a part of Baltimore, and a part of this world I think it is important to ask these questions. Why is there such a difference in income in Baltimore? Why do people still to this day see in black and white? I don’t know the answers to these questions but I am beginning to ask them, and I believe that is the first step. Loyola College and St. Katherine’s have completely different student populations, and despite the fact that the students of Loyola have more money, I believe the students of St. Katherine’s have a better understanding of community, race, love, and God than many students of Loyola. I never thought such a young girl could be so bold to ask “Why.”